Hi and welcome to another episode of Sensible Sensei.
In today's episode we will talk about Self Talk.
So, at the evolution of mankind, we humans didn't have language or means to talk. So during that time, getting a therapy was very hard. Imagine for a second, you are Ongh Ry, of Artic Tundra. You were almost crushed to death by a mammoth. The PTSD is taking charge. Because of lack of social etiquettes, you pee the moment you see a mammoth before running at speed of 15 m/s. Seeing this, your wife refuses to indulge in coitus with you. Seeing her getting attracted towards the well built, Wzy Ha, makes your heart burn. Now, you want to get therapy to vent out thoughts. But because of lack of communication you can't find anyone. So, in the end you decide to take the best possible action your smartass brain can think of. You talk to yourself about it. Since no form of language, written or vocal, had been developed yet. You talk to yourself but the mind is blank. You can think, but it's not thinking thinking. Mind just feels blank. Because of this misery, you start living a lower status. Killing small animals like hare and eating fruits and herbs.
Fast forward a lot of years.
Science has advanced. Language has been made. Not just one but a lot of them. Lingos and slangs were a common thing. Paintings were not the only way of communication. You are Merkel Marlene. Year 1929 has begun. Just like hyperinflation, your tension turns into hypertension. Because you are a meek, short but independent woman, you live alone away from your family in sub urban areas of Germany. Day by day, just like your country you are falling into Great Depression. The value of money decreases everyday, same as your value in your mind. Because you are not able to meet ends properly and carry a cart full of cash everyday to get a loaf of bread. You decide that getting married and pooling resources is a great way to ensure you can survive for long. You decide and marry a fellow worker. Things in the starting were working fine. He worked and got the groceries while you worked and cooked. Life for once felt good in the great depression. But, destiny had another plans. Due to the monetary condition of the country and company, your husband was laid off one day. Because of the suddenness of the act, your husband falls into depression. Depression sucking all the motivation to get a new job, made his condition worse. Load to run the whole household, you, your husband and your kids, falls solely on you. You suggest your husband to cope up with depression. He in his mental capacity comes up with the best coping mechanism. He starts drinking. Stealing money was not easy for him. But the time you went to work, it was convenient for him to go out and get the localy made crude Schwarzgebrannter. Over time his drinking habit becomes addiction. He can't stop himself. He beats you after getting drunk. You are depressed. Your life seems black. But being the conservative woman you were raised as. You don't leave him. Overtime, because of his deteriorating help. He passes away in his sleep. You have to talk about the whole shit to someone. But for a person barely surviving, therapy is expensive. Too expensive. You decide to start self talking. But unlike, Ongh Ry, you have the great gift called language. You start writing your thoughts on random pieces of paper because buying paper was an expensive affair. You try talking to yourself, but unacquainted with this new territory. You fall into the endless loop of overthinking. Making your mental condition worse.
Fast forward a few decades
Year is 2021. The life is shit. Covid, riots, wild fires, etc make the situation worse. You are Raj Tiwari, a boy living in Gurgaon. Being the teenager you are. The suicide of Sushant Singh Rajput has made you take more interest in mental health. You have received 1000s of messages in span of about a month, how if you ever feel sad and want to talk to someone, you can talk to them. Being recently rejected by your crush Janvi. You are heart broken. So you talk to the people who said that they will help you in your bad mental health. But, just like ache din. They are nowhere to be seen. You look for them like hungry people look for food, thirsty people look for water and students look for extra marks. Though a resident of Gurgaon, the most you can spend for your mental health at the moment is ₹14 for a goldflake. But after reading a post of billionaire.boi_riches on Instagram you decide that not a cigarette and saving those money will make you have $340000 by the time you are 84. You decide to stop smoking. Few days later you see the movie Shaadi Mein Zarooe aana. And the song Thukra ke Mera Pyaar made you burn in rage. So you decide to become ripped. You start working out. Eating proper food and getting sunlight. You adopt healthy habits like writing journal, eating healthy, hanging out, socializing. Your life starts becoming better. Weakness disgusts you. You start reading books. Have good and successful friends. You aim to be like them. You start attracting people. Girls hit on you. Boys ask to be your friend. You life improves. You self talk, but instead of overthinking it is critical thinking. It makes your life better. You are happier. Janvi tried to slide in your dm one day but because you already have a girlfriend who loves and you don't feel any attraction towards Janvi. You left her on seen. You think about it and feel your choice was actually bad. You thank God that you didn't end up with her. You have enough money to get therapy. But you don't need to. Since you became so better, you decide to help your friends too. They are grateful for your advice. You see them grow. That makes you happy. You still face hardships every now and then. But you know, that is the part of life. But unlike your youth, you are well prepared for optimistic about the problems you face. Each obstacle is a stepping stone. Life couldn't get any better. Life's great. And you are probably the happiest person alive. That's it for today.
See you in the next episode.